Wedding Anniversaries

1st

On our first wedding anniversary I presented my husband with our firstborn. I quipped, "The baby's all we can afford." It wasn't all though. I also gave him a poem written in four-line stanzas. While "Ishi" conforms to a regular meter, it rhymes irregularly. Since I'd just concluded my first year of teaching English, literature occupied my mind. I've footnoted for those of you who aren't familiar with the allusions.

Ishi[1]

One year has lapped our bank of love, Ishi,

And rich deposit laid, with interest

On principal that marriage did invest.

Yet must I pledge still more on our account –

A gentler, more submissive wife I’d be,

Like Belmont’s Portia[2] thousand times herself.

I’d sing the excellence of thy heart’s wealth

Like Lebanon’s dove,[3] the bride of Solomon.

With Madame Winthrop’s[4] praise I’d echo thine:

That truly thou dost love both God and wife.

As prophesied King Lemuel,[5] so may I strive

To canopy thy love and crown thy life.

[1]  a tender Hebrew word that means “my husband” (pronounced ee-shee) – See Hosea 2:16.

[2]  a wealthy, wise heiress in Shakespeare’s Merchant of Venice – She wins the man she loves and saves his friend from death.

[3]  the Shulammite woman of Solomon 6:13 – She represents faithful love.

[4]  respected woman in the Massachusetts Bay colony of colonial America and model wife to Gov. John Winthrop – In her famous letters to him she expressed her faith, her affectionate love, and her support.

[5]  the poet who wrote the final chapter of Proverbs – An acrostic, Proverbs 31 extols the “virtuous woman.”

50th

My husband and I recently celebrated our fiftieth wedding anniversary. As I approached that milestone, I reflected on the precious heritage that blesses us. On both sides of the family, our parents, grandparents, and great grandparents lived out decades of union, almost all of the couples enjoying golden anniversaries and more.

How rare in today's world!

Lately, people have asked me, “What is the secret?” I’ve pondered this question. The best answer I can give for marital longevity is the word commitment. When our forebears said, “I do,” their vows were sacred until death. They loved faithfully.

We now pass that torch to our children and their wonderful spouses to carry for generations to come.

To honor our golden wedding anniversary, the whole family gathered together. I read the poem below to commemorate the occasion. The first stanza is about my husband. The second about me. And the third about our entire extended family. In the poem are a couple of references that only people well acquainted with the Boniface clan will understand. Footnotes let you in on our secrets.

Golden

After fifty years, I know you . . .

the slope of your shoulders as you walk,

snapping your fingers just like your dad

or drumming your hands on any surface.

I know how hard you hanker for harmony,

how you check the door locks at night.

I know your silly dance moves and

the punchlines to all your jokes.

Your favorite color is red sauce for pasta.

You love to study the Bible.

You are faithful, gentle, and kind.

You love our family. You love me always.

After fifty years, you know me . . .

the way I keep the lamp on to read in bed

so that you cover your eyes with a t-shirt,

jealous of the book in my hand.

You know I like red geraniums and purple salvia

and dirty dishes rinsed right away.

You know your teasing annoys me,

but hope in vain that I’ll laugh.

My favorite things are tiny or chocolate.

I love to weave words into poems.

I am independent, hard-working, determined.

I love our family. I love you still.

After fifty years, all y’all know us . . .

a cozy quilt of blue eyes and brown eyes

hosting tea parties, cheering at soccer games,

splashing  in waves, savoring meals, riding dunes.

We know we are family making more stories,

playing Sammy the Spider[1] or chess or pretend.

We know our separate souls are stitched into one

with room to add new patchwork pieces.

Our favorite is Christmas bread[2] warm from the oven.

We love joining to celebrate or to comfort.

We are loyal, caring, supportive.

We love each other. Today and all tomorrows.

___________

[1]   This a game my husband invented for our children. Now he also plays it with our grandchildren. Lying on their backs, they have to identify imaginary characters descending upon them simply by their signature motions – Sammy the Spider, Wally the Whale, Willy the Wiggleworm, et al. If they fail, they are tickled. Oh, the squeals and laughter!

[2]   The recipe for this cardamom yeast bread came from a family friend who saved my dad’s life. I braid and bake it every December 25th in grateful remembrance. Only some of it survives snatchers hovering over the cooling racks and makes it to the table, frosted and sprinkled with red holly berries and green jimmies. Spoiler Alert--A poem about it is coming!

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